Don't Keep Score in Your Marriage

Marie loves a game. So for our 24th anniversary we put 24 things we have learned in 24 years of marriage on numbered slips, dropped them in a bucket, and gave ourselves 45 seconds to a minute to explain each one. Go short or go long, and you do not get the point.

Logan kept score. That was the joke. One of the slips said, Don't keep score.

We have done it. You have done it. Who unloaded the dishwasher. Who prayed. Who carried more of the load this season. Who apologized first. Before long you are not on the same team. You are keeping a tally.

Here is what 24 years keeps teaching us. Love is a decision, not just a feeling. You can disagree and still be deeply in love. Never use vulnerability as ammunition later. Some arguments are not worth winning. Date your spouse even when life is busy. Laugh together. And your spouse is not your enemy.

Ministry can strengthen a marriage. It can also put enormous pressure on one. Your children should not become the center of it. Your spouse cannot meet every emotional need you have. That is not a slight. That is why we still need the Lord, and why we still need each other.

We are still learning how to love each other well. After 24 years, that is not a failure. That is the work.

If your marriage feels like a scoreboard, watch this one. Then put the pencil down.

Watch the episode:
https://youtu.be/MK4HjHzJVrs

1 John 1:7. Ephesians 4:32. Proverbs 27:6. Galatians 4:16. Proverbs 17:22.

If this helped, send it to a couple you love. Not as a lecture. As a reminder you are on the same team.